Mule Smuggling Disaster

Can you believe it! Our eldest triplet (by 4 hours - it was long confinement) has been in bother with the interbanational police authorites again!!

Of course, we've all heard of so-called 'Drug Mules', well, May has only gone and tried to smuggle a real mule home from Ireland, where she was working as some sort of tester for a few months. Apparently, she saw it shivering in a Donegal field, felt sorry for it and managed to get the poor thing half way through departures at Dublin International Airport before she was arrested by the Irish police (or "Gardes" as they call them out there. Ray prefers the term "Coppers").

Let's hope she gets a light sentence as she didn't know what she was doing or why. Never has.

TTFN  Fay xxx

No Surprises Here

Suffolk enjoyed an uneventful, if in places noisy, start to 2012 as thousands of people across the county celebrated the start of Olympic year.

A spokeswoman for Suffolk police said officers had had a busy night, but there were no major incidents that they had had to deal with.

Overnight showers are thought to have persuaded many people to remain in indoor parties and to resist the temptation to spill out on to the streets at midnight.
Some people did set off fireworks to mark the start of the new year – but their efforts could not match the 10-minute extravaganza that heralded the New Year on the bank of the River Thames in London.

Insect Disaster

There we were at a children's tea party when a wasp flew right up Fay's frock, stinging her several times, which resulted in Fay running round the garden tearing her dress off and screaming like a banshee, followed by a line of toddlers doing the same, thinking it was a new and exciting party game.
Before too many of the dads could get their so-called 'camera-phones' loaded and firing, Fay managed to make a dash to the kitchen and stand in the sink, pouring jelly and ice cream impregnated washing up water over her rapidly swelling body. Thankfully Ray arrived with un-charactericstic kind and reassuring words, jumped on to the draining board and began smearing her with salt and vinegar crisps.
What and end to the party!
Bees make honey. Wasps make Marmite.

Trouble Down Under

One of our triplets, May - not the favourite - has got into trouble on her way back from Australia of all places. Seems she tried to smuggle a live wombat onto the aeroplane in her hand luggage after attempting to sedate the poor creature with a mixture of Haribos {whatever that is}, gin & tonic and some cheese.

Unsurprisingly, it's noisy whimpers were overheard by a keen airline official who refused to accept May's explanation of 'indigestion' as she tried to drown out the noise with cries of her own. A search of May's bag soon revealed the hapless marsupial {named 'Rupert'} befouling a fluffy hot water bottle case in the shape of a boomerang May was also bringing back as a present for one of her many friends.

We can't bail her out, mainly because we don't want to. Hopefully her stay in prison won't be too long or arduous, and at least they speak a rudimentary form of English there. May was always a big fan of 'Prisoner Cell Block H' {like her mother} so now's her chance to "Live The Dream".

No worries.

Here's A Thought...

What's the point of having a change when you can have a routine?

Result Result Result

Well, there's been quite a few developments in the Bray household recently - it isn't all watching the golden channels and wrestling with laundry.
Our triplets have all received their university (or "Uni") degree results
Jay (Media) 1:2
Kay (The History of Clay) 1:2
May (Fashion) 1:2

So, it's a straight 1:2, 1:2, 1:2 for our clever (and passably pretty) girls. Ray's best friend Pete Benjamins says it's like being at a sound check for a Pink Floyd gig, but as usual, we have no idea what he is going on about. Maybe he's been on the Guinness Cocktails!

Jay wants to get a job straight away as she hears there are quite a few openings with News International (whoever they are). We think she should work her way up and perhaps start as a cub-ette reporter on the Bungay Bugle or even Earsham Exagerator.
Kay is going to apply to do and M.A. in The History of Clay. That should come in handy round Bungay way one day.
May has taken a 'gap month' in Australia of all places to study original, aboriginal and unoriginal fashion.

We would be proud, but pride is a deadly sin. Nonetheless, yesterday Ray brought home a two litre bottle of Lambrini and we drank a toast to our girls until the room seemed to be spinning. It couldn't have been, of course.

Household Tips From A Comedy Genius

By mistake I was watching a re-run of 'Room 101' on one of the Golden channels and saw the very funny Peter Cook showing us how he hated modern packaging and how plastic bags wouldn't open properly when you want them to. Well, as he showed us a tip he received from a cashier girl on how to open plastic bags that he said never works, it worked. Now I use his method (or rather, the anonymous cashier girl's method all the time). I wonder where she is now.

You see, you can get household tips from funny men like Peter Cook (even though he did get a bit sweary toward the end) from beyond the grave. Isn't technology wonderful!!!

TTFN
Fay XX